Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Randomize
