Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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