Me too!
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
