wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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