My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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