I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
