What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
