I want to make a zoo with you.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
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