her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Randomize
