i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
