We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Randomize