My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
