i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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