someone get that fucking seahorse.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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