its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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