She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
And the cops told us we were all naked.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize