Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
Jerry, you need to find god
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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