Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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