belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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