You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
