So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
