just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
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