When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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