So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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