Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
one might say we're banned from that church
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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