I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
