Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
