): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize