so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
