A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
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