I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
