I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
