Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
