Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
