mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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