I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Randomize
