Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
