Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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