I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
