we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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