Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
