some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
