just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
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