Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
