He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
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