he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
