God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize