My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize
