I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
We have started to decorate penises.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize