is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize