My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
